My doctor asked me how much alcohol I drink a week. She always asks me, and I always lie.

I said, “um, let me see” and tried to remember what I’d had – nothing last night, a couple of beers at work, maybe a couple of times, and my wife and I had gone through two bottles of wine that week, so that’s…. maybe 11 standard drinks. That’s not bad!

But then I remember that dinner out. How many times did they refill my glass? How many times did I empty it? Perhaps 20 is a more accurate figure?

“About 15” say I, thinking that 16 is the recommended max.

She looks at me, questioningly, and continues “and three alcohol free days a week, remember!”

I try to remember. Someone told me about a cunning way of drinking less without feeling like you were. It goes like this. Don’t drink for one day a week (easy) one week a month (not as easy, but possible) and one month a year (let’s make that February). Now, that doesn’t sound so bad, does it? Do this and you will have had 144 alcohol free days a year – over 20 weeks teetotal.

I haven’t actually tried it, but it seems like a good plan.

My doctor asks me this question because my GGT score is a bit high. So is my uric acid level and my bilirubin, not to mention all the other readings. I feel like an alcoholic. An old alcoholic. Which doesn’t seem right, because I’m convinced I don’t drink nearly as much as lots of people I know. And I’m not convinced it’s the pathway to a ripe old age.

Take Sir Winston Churchill who famously said:

“When I was younger I made it a rule never to take strong drink before lunch. It is now my rule never to do so before breakfast.”

His private secretary, Jock Colville, claimed Britain’s greatest leader would start the day with a “daily whisky mouthwash.” And then continue as he’d begun – with lots of champagne for lunch, and always a glass of brandy nearby.

Churchill was a fan of Pol Roger (as you’d know if you read this blog) and one estimate suggested he downed over 42,000 bottles of this fine champagne during his lifetime. That’s a lot of champagne. But then he did have a number of years to consume it. He died at the age of 90.

Then again, my paternal grandmother was a teetotaler (well, when she was in the company of Methodist friends) and lived to be 101. And Alexander the Great, an alcoholic amongst other things, died in his thirties.

It’s so confusing.

Anyway, if you’re still up for a drink, here’s a lovely chardonnay from Scotchman’s Hill in Bellarine: the 2015 Swan Bay, which will set you back $18.10 at Dan Murphy’s. This is how the winery describe it

“Grown and handcrafted using minimal intervention to respect the natural environment, the wines express individuality, purity and complexity.

A full and flavoursome Chardonnay displaying white peach and citrus notes, with creamy texture and restrained French oak.”

I preferred it to the Stoniers @ $19.95 or the Taylor’s Jarman for $21.

Your health!